life 3.0.

what is actually that we're expecting from life?

satu bulan menuju the notorious 30, I reminisce minutes after minutes of my life.
semua cerita, sakit hati dan bahagia.. satu persatu diputar kembali
just to get the meaning from all of that.

salah satu mantan saya pernah bilang,
saya adalah orang yang beruntung
karena hidup saya sangat bewarna
banyak yang datang dan pergi
banyak masalah dan cerita yang tidak biasa
banyak hal-hal yang hanya terjadi pada sedikit orang di dunia
and yet it happened to me

honestly, i never believed him.
I always thought that God just like to play drama with me
bahkan sempat terpikir bahwa mungkin aura saya yang membawa masalah selalu mendekat

Saya sadar, saya bukan orang paling menderita di dunia ini
masih banyak orang-orang yang permasalahannya jauh lebih berat
dengan penderitaan yang jauh lebih menyakitkan
dan hidup yang lebih susah.

Saya sadar, God has given me so many good things in life.
I have great friends and families,
which was, although they're not perfect (hey, who does anyway?),
tapi saya tahu mereka adalah yang terbaik untuk hidup saya

and my love life,,
I always thought back then, that this day today, I'll already end up with a family
a great husband and some children
raising their life
But here I am. And I can't complain more.

My career,,,
biasanya orang seumur saya sudah ada di posisi yang bagus
sudah punya ini dan itu. Dengan kata lain, sudah berhasil

I've just recently graduated from my training program
here at my late 29.
Some people might called it too late.
But this is me.

my problems,,
for some people, they have the luxury of leaving their past
not me.
the past has made me this way
there's no way I could ever forget that
it's my karma.

But there is one thing that I'm certain of
this whole life, has taught me to be a fighter
to accept the un-perfectness of it

So what? Here I am, facing my 30.
I'm not married yet. Why be sad?
It means that God has given me more time to think about myself
to be selfish for a while
to be able to go anywhere I can and do things that I want
without putting burden on someone else

So I'm just a junior employer
But I really, really, had a good time in my younger days
I spend time just fooling around
just being lazy and ignorance
and I've learned, that I had enough of it
so I'm no longer curious about it

My problems?
Sometimes I thank God, that He make them stays constantly in my life
so I remember
that those pains I've suffered. Semua berhasil saya lewati.
Satu per satu. Semua saat-saat dimana saya merasa ingin menyerah
ternyata terlewati, and I'm still living right now.

So now I start to believe that I am blessed with a colourful life
cause not everybody got this chance
to feel what I'm feeling

And I'm so ready to face the rest of my life.
with all the ups and downs
with all the hopelessness
cause later, I can look back at them, and learn.

Never say regret.